Battlefields

Not exactly cancer related things swirling today but things I am dealing with on the down low in spite of my self.

Our thoughts, our feelings, our inner little ticklings that make us human don't go missing because we are ill.  Nooooo, those little things set themselves on fire (maybe in a genuine attempt to distract us) or maybe just to simply make things worse.

Suddenly, in the midst of every bit of energy we should be bringing to being and doing better gets a big fat dose of "hey, how about this?" "why do you thiink this is happening?"  "what did YOU do that caused this?"  And there we go, now we aren't getting better, we are making ourselves worse.

The ultimate answer to these questions is.....nothing.  You, me and we are all human.  Capable of human mistakes, errors in judgement, thoughtless words and deeds at time.  In short, we are just like everyone else....we are ourselves.  And without the tolerance and forebearance of others (who are also only themselves) we would never recover from the affliction of simply being US.

This was a big revolving door opening onto a subject pretty prevalent in my mind right now.  The death of Charlie Kirk.  I was born in 1950....so if you are interested, you can track the timeline of my life and find for yourself the pivotal happenings on a global stage that I know about personally.  Things that hit hard, things I knew in that place between my ears were going to profoundly effect the trajectory of a lot of lives.  Most are not good events.  They are devastating, tragic, and frightingly evil.  Evil perpetuated on the young, the weak, the sick, the helpless, the old and the innocent.....those cry out for justice.  As a society we will be judged for how we deal with those unable to adequately care for and defend themselves.  And let me be clear here.....your "feelings" don't marginalize you....feelings are fickle and can change.  And I'm finding more and more that people who live inside their "feelings" are rarely happy and content because feelings lie to us.  And they lie most when we aren't at our best.

An assassination of a man who was known for encouraging open dialog with people who rabidly disagreed with him was abhorrent to me.  I've seen his words, cherry picked from bigger pieces to frame justification for why some simply "didn't like him."  What I always found odd, was he actually liked the people he debated.  His big open face and demeanor telegraphed his interest in finding a worthy opponent to hopefully find a common ground with.  These are people who we should "like", they aren't shutting down free speech or even rational free thought.  What they try to do is move us from feelings to those 6 inches between our ears where we can throw ice water on the feelings and actually "think."

I do know with 100% of my being that Charlie Kirk slipped the earthly tether and was immediately welcomed into the arms of the One who loved him most.  And, I pray that we, as a society, can take some lessons from his life here.  To stop communicating via email, text message (cold and impersonal) and sit in front of people with our issues, see their eyes, hear their voices....(tone and content matter, people.)  Be willing to engage someone you care about (personally), get out of your own feelings and "think".  It is hard.....it is hard to apologize, it's hard to admit you were wrong....even harder to set aside your own legitimate reasons for why you "feel" you were right.  Is being right worth losing an actual person over?  Really?  I can't think of a single person I can afford to lose in my life right now and yet I sense a slipping away during a time I am running on empty.  I can barely run...chasing is impossible.

Where do I go with this.  I'm going where Charlie went.  I'm going to God and asking for clarity on where my life is heading and how do I want to move forward.  With a directive from what I know God says, or a directive from my own "feelings" which aren't the same today as they were yesterday.  This is how I know I have to put God as my compass....because my feelings right now endanger me.  Only my faith keeps movement in my feet to move on....I have to go where God takes me.  I know good people, kind people who are building images of who I want to be in my heart and mind.  They make me feel for sure but they also challenge thought.  How can they be this generous with themselves when they have been through far more than I have?  Well, that might be how.  They were cast into the fires of inexplicable things and came out burnished pure gold.

In closing, I leave this....suddenly remembering a little group of children I had the pleasure of bringing this lesson to in Vacation Bible School...the component on whole armour of Christ.decades ago.  They enjoyed this, I enjoyed it.  They loved making the components of the Whole Armour of God and donning each separate piece day by day until they were "ready."  It means so much more to me now than it did then and I pray I was able to teach it well and that in some place they remember it too.

Ephesians 6 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

2 Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise;
3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ;
6 Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart;
7 With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men:
8 Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free.
9 And, ye masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threatening: knowing that your Master also is in heaven; neither is there respect of persons with him.
10 Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might.
11 Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.
12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;
15 And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace;
16 Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:
18 Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;
19 And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel,
20 For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that therein I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.
21 But that ye also may know my affairs, and how I do, Tychicus, a beloved brother and faithful minister in the Lord, shall make known to you all things:

Today I am going to spend some time in nature, by a lake with people who care about me.....today will be a good day.  Because today....I am in the right battlefield.